Your What-Ifs Keep You Stuck, Not Safe

If you had no fear, what would you do today?

Bella Martin
3 min readAug 10, 2022
Photo by Andrew Neel on Unsplash

Telling an anxious person to stop worrying is like telling a depressed person to be happy. It’s never that easy to calm our heads and hearts.

Even when we recognize our worries are illogical and our what-ifs are worst-case scenarios, this awareness doesn’t make the fear any less real. Anxiety isn’t based on the concern something awful will happen anyway, but instead on the insecurity that if it does, you won’t be able to handle it.

The anxious mind thinks it’s safer to predict every possible outcome so at least you can prepare for it. There’s a famous Benjamin Franklin quote: “By failing to prepare, you are preparing to fail.” These words are the mantra of an anxious mind.

We trick ourselves into believing that by worrying about something, we are working towards it even when we haven’t taken any concrete action. Worrying isn’t preparing but over-preparing. It’s not a product of thinking but the price you pay for over-thinking.

We hope to keep ourselves safe by weighing all of our options and their possible outcomes, but instead, we keep ourselves stuck. We think through everything but do nothing.

The only way out of this mental trap is through action, by making a decision and…

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Bella Martin

Words of healing, hope & happiness. | Find me on instagram @bellamwrites